Breaking: Jeff Bezos: Amazon launches “Prime” voyager to answer SpaceX. Prime members finance project


In a shocking turn of events, and on the heels of the amazing-and previously private-data on the number of Prime membership, Amazon has announced their answer to Elon Musk’s SpaceX project.

Dubbed “Prime Enterprise”, the 200 person and 1,000,000,000,000,000,000 bot carrying space exploration and AI piloted interplanetary voyager is projected to make its maiden voyage in 2013. The vessel was constructed as a joint venture with Star Trek.

Yes, its launching in 2013.

An Amazon representative said the time travel technology has not been released yet, but that Prime members who enrolled prior to 1999 will be able to take advantage of “time travel pricing” and buy items from at 1999 prices, as posted on the website in 1999.

Another spokesperson for Amazon declined an interview citing “ongoing patent research, filings and IP concerns.” They did comment on Prime membership claiming 100 million subscribers. Amazon has grown into the one of the world’s most valuable companies based on market cap and plans for world domination.



[This is a parody article and not to be taken seriously.]